Instead of jumping to bitterness, consider empathizing with their heart and letting go as you forgive them. This doesn't mean you need to go back. Forgiveness is an act of grace that involves you. Reconciliation isn't a requirement for forgiveness.
Set up proper boundaries, be assertive, and forgive. Move on. You're worth it.
// Here's the devotional... Included here for context. Credit to www.bible.com and Shannon Morrison.
Loving the Unlovable [Link]
According to church standards, I was pretty good. I “loved the sinner, hated the sin” until the day I had to put this cliché into practice. There it was, my life thrown into a tailspin over a deep betrayal. I had to make a choice: walk away from the relationship or love someone who could not have cared less about the pain that was being inflicted on me, with no remorse or resolution in sight.
I sought God hard for wisdom. What should I do? It was in this moment God revealed something to me—the heart of my betrayer. The saying “hurt people hurt people” was exactly what was happening. This person was in complete turmoil. Unfortunately, he didn’t know how to deal with it or where to take it, so it was taken to me.
A funny thing happens when we begin to focus on the heart of others rather than their behavior. We become compassionate—like Jesus. Suddenly, it's no longer about me and how I’ve been hurt. Instead, it becomes about ways to love them through their pain.
I believe this is what Jesus is saying in His powerful Sermon on the Mount. How easy it is to love people who are kind to us. Even non-believers do that. Chances are, they aren’t the ones who need love the most. Honestly, it’s probably the back-stabbing coworker, the lying spouse, the rebellious teenager, or the horrible waiter at lunch. Taking the journey of loving like Jesus is life-changing. It’s loving with eternity in mind. It’s a risk, but one worth taking!
“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." Matthew 5:43-48
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